Welcoming the New Year...Sort of

It is 2012, and while I am not sad that 2011 has finally finished, I find that this year is beginning with some internal trepidation for me.  I find I am currently approaching life, with a sort of, "what next?" pessimism; always, waiting for another shoe to drop.  So many shoes have dropped in a short period of time that I could easily open a shoe store. I know I can't live my life in fear of the "what next?", but knowing that and feeling it are two entirely different concepts.

In an effort to help conquer the, "what next?" fears, my resolution for 2012, is to try and live each day at a time.  I am a huge planner, and want to know what entire months look like at a glance. But thinking too far into the future, is a hindrance for my peace of mind right now. Our family sat around last night, during our technology-free time, and tried to determine one thing each of us would like to do this year.  My initial reaction was to make big plans.  Grand vacations, healthy living goals, future career goals, and all of those things fit the bill of "normal" resolutions for me.  And while those things are sometimes fun and sometimes necessary to consider, I finally decided that my big goal of the year is to finally get to take a bath in my own whirlpool bathtub. Nothing life changing.  Nothing that takes months to plan. Just something I can do, anytime, once our bathroom is officially finished. No New Year's resolution that will make me feel like a failure if I don't accomplish it.

Oh, and one more resolution, before my maternal grandma died, she told me that I spread myself too thin, and I was always on the go, doing something for someone. With that in mind, I am resolving, to be still more often. The last couple of weeks, I haven't been going many places. The kids and I have stayed home, a lot, but it has been comforting in a way. It has helped me gain a little focus in my topsy turvy world. Therefore, along with taking it a day a time, I am in essence going to strive to keep it simple too.

So with that, I wish you true joy in this new year, because I can attest that happiness just comes and goes. I hope that whatever resolutions you make, that they are important enough to keep, but not more important than spending time with and loving those around you.