There are a lot of things I could blog about right now, but to be honest, I just don't have the energy. So much happening in my life needs detailed explanations, and while some of you know it all, I can't blog bits and pieces for those that don't know the whole story. Instead, of rehashing the daily muck and stress that has been present since the loss of my maternal grandmother last October, I will focus on what I am thankful for and what has been a huge blessing.
I refer to 2011 as my "hell" year. One of the things that has gnawed at me day after day was my youngest's diagnosis with scoliosis. At age 6, it was a fairly progressed case, and though the doctor wasn't trying to scare us, or maybe he was, he indicated that surgery would be imminent if the condition worsened. I can't describe the feeling, the fear, when you learn that there is something wrong with your child. And the worst part in the beginning, was not knowing if there was some physical reason causing the scoliosis, or if it was simply idiopathic, unexplainable. After many tests, we learned it was indeed idiopathic, and we could begin the treatment phase. This included implementing a fairly substantial back brace that is hard plastic on the outside, and a foam like texture on the interior. We were instructed to use the brace every single night; the longer the better, with a goal of 10 to 12 hours. And so it began. There were tears of frustration, rebellion, anger, sadness, that all needed to be expressed by our child. The feeling that it was totally unfair to have to wear a back brace, what had she done to deserve it? Us, pointing out the positives, such as not having to wear the brace during the day, did little to help assuage the resentment of her situation. Some nights have been an absolute battle getting her in the brace, and some nights it is accepted with hopeless resignation. We have fallen into a pattern, where every night the brace is worn, except for approximately one night a month, or on special occasions/holidays.
Last week, was the day of reckoning. How were we doing? Was all of the agony of the brace paying off? It was the first x-ray that she had outside of the brace since beginning this whole process. A side note, her S curve in her spine was 31 and 36 degrees. We were told that even with bracing they could not promise improvement, though that was the hope since she had so much growing left to do. The goal of the brace was to stabilize the condition, to prevent it from worsening. I don't know what numbers I was hoping for walking into that appointment, but I felt on edge and unnerved. After the x-ray, we waited for the doctor's interpretation of what he saw, and he confirmed that the curves were now at 22 and 28 degrees. We were elated! Though the reward was not removal of the brace from our everyday lives, it was confirmation that we were on the right path, and that our efforts were not in vain. I am so incredibly thankful. The stress this caused in the short run, though at the time was extremely difficult, especially given other aspects of last year, was well worth it. I didn't understand at the time how any of it could be a "good thing", but being diagnosed when she was at such a young age, has probably helped alleviate many future, more serious back problems.
We are in this brace thing for the long haul. I don't see the doctors letting her go free, prior to her stopping growing, but even my 7 year old understands that her hard work and diligence is making a difference. She still grudgingly brings the brace to me every night, but there is less rebellion in it.
Even when the bits and pieces of my days are completely beyond my control and I think I am going to lose my mind, I can draw on this bit of good information again and again, because it hasn't ceased to make me smile yet. To God be the glory, great things He has done!
1 comment:
That's great!
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