Got Milk?

Awhile back, in an effort to save money, the man of the house and I bought a shaver to groom our dog. Every two months he is in desperate need of a shave, and after two uses the razor made back its cost. We are far from experts, and the poor dog usually finishes one of his home grooming sessions slightly pink, because so much hair gets shaved and he is left virtually naked. These haircuts are usually provided courtesy of my husband. Tired of seeing my baby's haircut mutilated, time after time, I took matters into my own hands.

About a week ago, I shaved him myself. It went better than it usually does, BUT it still wasn't a great job.  My husband arrived home before I had completed my work, and of course, took over.  All that I really had left to shave on the dog was one leg and his belly.  A few swipes of the razor and his belly was bare...and pink. Naturally, after one of these grooming sessions, the dog is very cold. In fact, he will sometimes sleep under the covers on our bed for days, and this time was no exception.

Fast forward to today, and the dog was rolling on the floor and sticking his feet in the air.  This means, "rub my belly".  My eldest child reached over and started to scratch, eliciting several appreciative thumps of the dog's tail, and then she stopped, horrified.  "Mommy!  What is that?!" I looked down and noticed she had located one of his nipples, which would normally be discreetly covered by, I don't know, HAIR. And perhaps being cold didn't help either. I calmly explained what it was, and that he has several, and I reminded her that if he were a girl dog and had puppies they would be able to get their milk from there. My eldest wanted to know what the point of nipples were on a boy dog, to which I had no real answer. Male nipples really serve no practical purpose, do they? Decoration?

Meanwhile, my youngest had been playing a video game, but apparently she was taking in every bit of the conversation.  She said very placidly, "It really is too bad he isn't a girl dog." I figure we have plenty of estrogen in our house, so I ask, "And why is that?" She lifted her eyes from the video game and gave me one of those classic "duh looks". "Because Mommy, then we wouldn't have to go all the way to the store to get our milk!"