A Knock At The Door

Tonight, someone knocked on our door at 10:45 p.m. We are not the type of family that has visitors at that hour, and though my husband and I were still up and about, the knock alarmed me. You see, last year, both of my grandmothers passed away, and my parents came to my home to tell me, per my request. I didn't want a phone call with bad news. However, I did not weigh out the implications of ill-timed knocks at the door either. The first time, I was awakened at 2:00 a.m., and the second time, it was slightly before 8:00 a.m.  Not typical times to expect a knock, so given the history, when I heard the knock tonight, I immediately freaked out. My husband was in the office at the other end of our house, and I yelled for him in a slightly hysterical voice.  Horrible thoughts were already running through my head, and I hadn't even made it out of our bedroom. Our children heard the commotion and our youngest had leaped to the same conclusion I had, and was already crying. The good news is, it turned out to be nothing.  A guy was lost and came to our door to figure out our address.  He was two houses off from the one he needed. Though immediately relieved, I was still struggling through the effects of a mild panic attack. It hit me like a freight train, and I realized, that in seconds I had leaped through several family members in my mind, that could have been "the one" that was gone. My husband, ever logical, broke it down for me after the man had left our door, and explained how it couldn't have been about this family member or that.  His rationale, though practical, didn't immediately expunge the panicky feelings. I wanted time to recover and regain my composure completely, but being a mom, I was forced to push my needs aside for the time being.  I had to comfort my children, and assure them that all really was well. They were looking to me, not my husband, because they had gone where I had gone mentally, and they knew I understood. All is well that ends well, and I am thankful that this was nothing more than a false alarm tonight.  My perspective has been forever altered about something as simple as a knock on my door though.